<div class="section1"><div class="Normal"><script language="javascript">doweshowbellyad=0; </script><br />On March 8, International Women''s Day, I was watching the late night news in English. I was bemused by the incongruity of the news stories. Read on. <br /></div> <div align="left" style="position:relative; left: -2"><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" align="left" border="1" width="14.8%"> <colgroup> <col width="100.0%" /> </colgroup> <tr valign="top"> <td width="100.0%" colspan="1" rowspan="1" style="" valign:="" top="" background-color:="" f3f3f3=""> <div class="Normal"><img src="/photo/558103.cms" alt="/photo/558103.cms" border="0" /><br /><span style="" font-size:="">Sudha Pillai</span></div> </td> </tr> </table></div> <div class="Normal"><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="" font-style:="" italic="">The Vagina Monologues</span><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="">, the controversial play, came to Mumbai to celebrate Women''s Day.
Thanks to the efforts of Mahabanoo Mody Kotwal. This play rejoices "women''s sexuality and strength and exposes the violations endured by women". (I cannot comment on the play because I have not seen it) Mody Kotwal said, "In India, we use sex to sell everything from washing powder to pain reliever. And yet, we cannot discuss sex, sexuality and related matters like normal, healthy adults should." (I agree with Ms Kotwal) </span><br /><br /><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="">What was ironical was that the channel that interviewed the cast of </span><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="" font-style:="" italic="">The Vagina Monologues </span><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="">refused to utter the word vagina. Yes, not once did they enunciate the V word. While the newsreader said, "Here''s a report on a very interesting play" the reporter kept referring to </span><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="" font-style:="" italic="">The Vagina Monologues </span><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="">as "this play" or "the play that deals with women''s issues." When an arm is an arm, a hand is a hand, and an ear is not a tunnel by the side of the head, why should a vagina, a body part like any other, be called "this"? There is no need to pay ode to the vagina, but at least let us call it by its name when we have to. </span><br /><br /><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="">What was paradoxical was that here was an intrepid channel which sends its women to cover war, riots and politics, balking at uttering the word ‘vagina'' on air. Does their organisational policy object to mentioning the biological names of body parts? I don''t know, but I sure found the entire episode amusing. All I can say is that Ms Kotwal has a long way to tread before she could actually hear people say the word ‘vagina'' without looking over their shoulders and turning pink all at once. </span><br /><br /><span style="" font-size:="" font-weight:="" bold="">The second story was about 25-year old Chanchal who was fighting for her life at a hospital in the capital. Apparently, this young woman was subjected to dowry harassment from the time she entered ‘holy'' matrimony, last year. Two months ago, she gave birth to a baby girl and her husband stopped talking to her. On that fateful day, Chanchal had an altercation with the family that resulted in her sister-in-law dousing Chanchal with kerosene and lighting her up. Chanchal suffered 95 per cent burns. </span><br /><br /><br /></div> </div><div class="section2"><div class="Normal"><br />I wonder whether Chanchal''s life would''ve been different if the women in her life had been supportive. Had her mother-in-law and sis-in-law stood by her maybe her husband wouldn''t have had the nerve to ill-treat her (Chanchal lived in a joint family). If her mother and sisters had encouraged her to walk away from a bad marriage ("society''s opinions be damned") maybe today Chanchal wouldn''t be battling for her life. Why didn''t the women in her life celebrate the birth of her baby girl, one of their own species? It took a woman to send another one to the jaws of death -- on International Women''s Day, of course! Are women their own worst enemies? <br /><br />The disparities in the next two stories were great mindticklers. In Jammu and Kashmir some women were fighting against the bill passed by the state government that would seize their rights to property if they married outside the state. (These guys need to have their heads examined. They make ‘marrying outside the state'' sound like ‘marrying in Mars''). However, the men can marry outside the state, the country and in Mars and still own property in J&K. Discrimination of the highest order. <br /><br />Except for a few women who were crying hoarse, the rest seemed resigned to their fate, under their hijabs. It seemed like they would succumb meekly and hand over the privileges to live their lives over to their men folk. Whereas, down south in Chennai, people seemed to quake in their rubber chappals at the overwhelming power of Amma. Property rights in the state? Definitely belongs to Amma and clan -- solely. Pota is her personal Vishnu chakra with which she annihilates dissent. Her female power hangs like a sword over the heads of all those who live under her rule. <br /><br />What''s almost satirical here is that at one end of the spectrum you have powerless women and at the other end you have a woman who misuses her power. Two faces of one species. Can we get more contradictory or what? <br /><br />But the story that left me with sanguinity for my own kind was that of a group of HIV infected women who have collectively taken charge of their lives, showing their middle finger to the world that scorns them. They contracted the infection from their spouses. But, they did not give up on life. They did not commit suicide, they did not hide in a dark hole away from a hostile society, and they did not let others pinch their right to live. They just picked themselves up and found a way to live their lives to the best of their ability and to the fullest. And they have done it with utmost grace and courage. Feisty but not haughty. Benevolent without being malevolent. Valour without fear. <br /><br />That to me is an embodiment of the true spirit of a woman. Life is a paradox, isn''t it? After all, it takes one woman to demonstrate to another how to be a woman in the truest sense.<br /><br /><formid=367815></formid=367815></div> </div>
